My first post: On Pleasing the Algorithm
Sticking to the Script
1. Why this, why now
Tell your readers why you are launching this space: BOATLOADS OF MONEY
what inspired you to do it now: THE AFOREMENTIONED1 BOATLOADS
Think of it as a mini personal manifesto: I THINK, THEREFORE I NEED MONEY
2. What kind of community are you looking to build here
You are not just starting a newsletter when you start a Substack, you are starting a community. You are inviting people to subscribe to your thinking. What kind of space will this be?
IRONIC AND SILLY AND TENDER
3. Be specific
Readers love clarity. Be clear when you explain what they should expect: how often will you be posting? Can they expect certain posts on specific days? What will the free subscribers get? What does a paid subscription buy them? (You can list these benefits in bullets.)
YOU CAN’T EXPECT ANYTHING.
FREE SUBSCRIBERS WILL BE TREATED LIKE ROYALTY.
PAID SUBSCRIBERS WILL BE TREATED LIKE SHAREHOLDERS.
PAID BENEFITS INCLUDE:
-SUPPORTING AN ARTIST (WHICH IS LIKE A CARBON OFFSET FOR CONSUMERISM)
-LESS MONEY, FEWER PROBLEMS
-SECRET STORIES
4. Use an image and “subscribe” buttons
A picture will look nicer when you share the post on your social media (click the image icon in the editor to search for copyright-free photos), and it will give color to your archive as you build it: FINE.
5. Ignore our advice
This is your playground, experiment with it. If you’re having fun, your readers will too: I’M HAVING FUN AND I’M GOING BUCK WILD!2

Being the one previously mentioned or spoken of.
Crazy, unrestrained, uncontrolled.
*Offer only applies to readers based in Northern Madagascar **
**Until Wednesday***
***At 1:30pm


this is a historic day